I recently saw "Treasure Raiders". Think "Fast and the Furious" meets "Indiana Jones". I can sum up the entire review in three words:
Don't see it.
It's... Amazingly bad. *Amazingly*. The director of photography should get some sort of award, and the rest of the people that made this movie? Don't let any of them near a camera. They'll end up going on trial for crimes against humanity, because I'm fairly sure that a film this bad counts as torture in most countries.
Plot: American Professor / Conspiracy Theorist / Street Racer searches for un-named treasures in Moscow, while trying to balance grading undergraduate papers and street racing with his Porsche 911 Carrera. Along the way, he meets a "Conan the Barbarian" era clone of Schwarzenegger (it's rather uncanny, right down to the Austrian accent) named 'Wolf'. Wolf is a Very Large ManTM who tries to balance vigilante justice and street racing.
Wolf drives a Camaro with a built-in James Bond style missile launcher that can blow up cars in front of him, rocketing them so high into the air that he can drive right under them before they fall back down, and that's one of the more believable parts of the movie.
I mean, if a Camaro Z28 can beat a Porsche 911 Carrera three times in a row, anything is possible!
Professor meets Wolf, loses race against Wolf. Wolf pauses mid-race to take out Evil Bad Drug DealersTM, dump the cocaine in the river, donates the money to several drug rehab clinics and goes back to win the race, a spare driver in a duplicate car keeping all the other racers unaware of the events transpiring right under their very noses.
Professor notices Wolf wearing Sekrit Templar Treasure Locater Amulet and enlists him to aid in his crazy adventures through Moscow tracking down the Unnamed And Rather Vague Sekrit Treasure of the TemplarsTM. But David Carradine is Evil and will Have None of That.
David Carradine pays for his interference by dying at the hands (or should it be detonators?) of Wolf's rocket launchers in a rather anti-climatic showdown. The police come in and arrest all the bad guys, but leave Wolf alone, because (and I shit you not) in the words of one of the policemen "We can't arrest him - he's done more than us to fight crime!".
Yeah. That pretty much sums it up.
Don't see it.
It's... Amazingly bad. *Amazingly*. The director of photography should get some sort of award, and the rest of the people that made this movie? Don't let any of them near a camera. They'll end up going on trial for crimes against humanity, because I'm fairly sure that a film this bad counts as torture in most countries.
Plot: American Professor / Conspiracy Theorist / Street Racer searches for un-named treasures in Moscow, while trying to balance grading undergraduate papers and street racing with his Porsche 911 Carrera. Along the way, he meets a "Conan the Barbarian" era clone of Schwarzenegger (it's rather uncanny, right down to the Austrian accent) named 'Wolf'. Wolf is a Very Large ManTM who tries to balance vigilante justice and street racing.
Wolf drives a Camaro with a built-in James Bond style missile launcher that can blow up cars in front of him, rocketing them so high into the air that he can drive right under them before they fall back down, and that's one of the more believable parts of the movie.
I mean, if a Camaro Z28 can beat a Porsche 911 Carrera three times in a row, anything is possible!
Professor meets Wolf, loses race against Wolf. Wolf pauses mid-race to take out Evil Bad Drug DealersTM, dump the cocaine in the river, donates the money to several drug rehab clinics and goes back to win the race, a spare driver in a duplicate car keeping all the other racers unaware of the events transpiring right under their very noses.
Professor notices Wolf wearing Sekrit Templar Treasure Locater Amulet and enlists him to aid in his crazy adventures through Moscow tracking down the Unnamed And Rather Vague Sekrit Treasure of the TemplarsTM. But David Carradine is Evil and will Have None of That.
David Carradine pays for his interference by dying at the hands (or should it be detonators?) of Wolf's rocket launchers in a rather anti-climatic showdown. The police come in and arrest all the bad guys, but leave Wolf alone, because (and I shit you not) in the words of one of the policemen "We can't arrest him - he's done more than us to fight crime!".
Yeah. That pretty much sums it up.
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